Buffalo resident Jeff Markum sipped his coffee early Monday morning as if it were any other day. "I was actually just about to leave for work when it happened. I dropped my coffee quicker than a rabbit that wandered into a dog pen." Jeff told BS News that when he opened his front door he saw a large group of ISIS members chanting "Death to America" as they made their way to Hip Pocket Pizza.
This comes only a few days after the discovery that Sayfra Yassin was posting a number of hateful and deadly tweets on Twitter. Local expert and watcher of Fox News Bert Willstein says between Yassin's imprisonment, and the group of armed terrorists on their way to eat a pizza with homemade cracker crust, there's never been more proof that Buffalo has been invaded by ISIS.
"I've been telling everyone for years that ISIS would invade America," Willstein told us as he polished a loaded bazooka, "I just never though it would be on my own front door." Outside, Willstein's 9 year old son was placing "Don't Tread On Me" stickers across the front of the house to help keep the murderous radicals from entering the home.
City officials say that between a popular sidewalk crumbling from heavy use in the city square and a terrorist organization setting up camp, this is going to be a busy week for Buffalo.
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