Missouri Governor Jay Nixon declared today that the town of Springfield lacks the number of Chinese and Japanese restaurants he believes should be available. "A person traveling down Glenstone has access to only around eleven oriental restaurants" Nixon told us in our interview, "A person that can't afford Nakato must either walk to the mall or drive nearly a quarter-mile to reach Asian King." Nixon says this is an "unprecedented" level of inconvenience that must be addressed in the near future. A ballot will soon be opened to vote on "Preparation H," a proposed multi-million dollar plan to add a miniature Japanese or Chinese restaurant to each and every business in Springfield.
Local plumbing expert Dan Walt doesn't agree that this is the path Springfield should take. In our phone conversation he informed us that "Over sixty percent of Springfield's plumbing systems are in place to handle the massive amounts of diarrhea that the increasing number of low quality chinese venues are causing." Dan believes that Springfields plumbing and sewage systems would require a full overhaul before they could handle the amount of low quality chinese Nixon desires. "It would be the stickiest situation Springfield ever got itself into."
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